Friday, January 9, 2009

Precious Gifts

I am living with one foot in August 13, 2006. I suppose it will always be this way. How could it be otherwise? This is the day I watched helplessly as my daughter's soul flew on the wings of an angel to God. There is a piece of me that will always reside off Highway 126 in a beautiful glass case. For there amidst the stepping stones of life and death lay a piece of my heart. I sometimes think I could stay beside her memorial all day and night, wishing to hold on as long as possible to whatever I can.

Instead, I help her daughters trim their flowers and put them in the vase with water. We talk about their mommy and smile at the photos and all the things placed there that are reminders of her. And then, as I walk away, two little hands in mine, another piece of me stays behind. A perfect piece. That piece of my heart stays there with my own little girl one of the most miraculous creations.

God gave me a gift, one of many. What did he give you?


Becky said...

Such a sad post.
Brought tears to my eyes this morning.

Mental P Mama said...

I don't know how you do it. What a blessing she will always be, and those precious babies, left behind for now, to be loved on.

CeeCee said...

I can't imagine how you do it. I guess you do what you have to do. Your grandgirls are so lucky to have you in their lives---to help them have memories of their mom and love them as much as she would have.

Beside the gift of my 3 children, God gave me a good man to raise them with. I did not, as the myth goes, 'marry my father'.

Carolynn said...

Oh, Vonda. My heart breaks for you and I'm weeping for your unimaginable loss.

Yet, there is such beauty, tenderness, and love in your words.

What has God given me? So, many, many blessings too numerous to count and more with each breath of air I take. You, my friend, are definitely one of those blessings and you enrich my life in ways you are not even aware of.

Much love to you,

Deb said...

I cannot image your hearbreak and I am so very sorry for your loss. I'm thankful that you have your grandaughters to love and nurture and teach about their wonderful mother.
God has blessed me with two wonderful sons and a husband that I'm sure I don't deserve.

I lost my brother at age 23. That was 25 years ago. I have his son with me now who just turned 25 yesterday. That is an enormous blessing as this child wasn't old enough to remember his father. He's learning about him now from our family through photos and memories. It's a joy having him.

okiesister said...

Beautiful words...thank you for sharing. My heart breaks for you today.

He gave me the Hope that one day I will be reunited with those I love.

TSannie said...

Your hearts will always be entwined.

Farmgirl_dk: said...

Oh Vonda, my heart hurts for your loss. Kyla's babies are so lucky to have you as their grandma. Not only do you give them the very best love, but you will always help them to remember their mama.

Junebug said...

Oh...heartbreaking! I'm so glad there is a resurrection!

Tipper said...

He gave me 2 beautiful girls-and you are teaching me-no matter how stinky life gets-having my 2 girls is more than enough to be happy. Yes one of your feet and part of your heart will always be in August 2006.

Yolanda said...

My heart goes out to you and my prayers too.

noble pig said...

Oh geez, I am so heartbroken right now reading this. I can't even imagine...cannot even imagine the pain you have lived and continue to feel.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us and trusting us with them.

The W.O.W. factor said...

Oh Vonda, my heart goes out to you. I've read your other blog...and I've just been at a loss for words. I cannot imagine.
You are blessed with the little ones, to help you keep your daughter's presence with you for ever, and you with her.
You have my thoughts, and many {{{HUGS}}}, Vonda.

Kristi said...

My precious gift from God is my three "babies". Although they hate it when I call them that, but they will always be my babies just like your daughter will always be yours. I try not to get to frustrated or busy to take time to appreciate how much they mean to me.

Another precious gift is my Mother. I couldn't imagine not having her or my daughters. Your daughter was blessed to have a "precious Mother" as well.